With All Endings, Come a New Beginning

I want to start by thanking everyone who participated in the blog giveaway.  2 weeks ago I decided it was time to take a step back and take a break.  The medication dose I was on, was not high enough, quick enough.  I figured what better time and way to thank everyone who reads this blog and gives me the support I need on this journey of Infertility.

Today it came to an end.  I am very happy to announce that Ashley, a friend I have made through Project Wedding and still keep in touch with since my wedding has won the giveaway.  She was comment Number 7!!!  Please send me your mailing address and I will send you out this amazing headband!!  She has an adorable blog as well if you'd like to check it out.

If you want an adorable headpiece of your own.  Please check out Mila Rose Designs on http://www.etsy.com/.

Today I also had a doctor appointment, No miracle baby yet.  Time to start a new beginning and cycle.  I am super excited to start up the Bravelle again soon. 

I spent the last hour having my heart melt by the newest little heart throb!!  Today my friend Megan gave birth to a handsome little boy.  Jeffery Robert, 10 Ibs. 13 Oz., 21 1/2 inches long.  Listening to his little grunts and watching those facial expressions is one of the most amazing things ever. 

Congrats to the new Mom & Dad!!! Love you both, and Jeff so much!!! 

I will leave you with today's Photo Challenge:

Day 23 - A picture of your favorite book

(Picture found via google search)

I have always loved Tori Spelling! This was one of the first which got my hooked on Tori's books and reality show.

You can't be cheap when it comes to Infertility

So the truth about infertility treatment is that it doesn't run cheap.  I am blessed enough for my husband to have some amazing insurance when it comes to all of my consultation, bloodwork and ultrasound appointments.  Unfortunately, when it comes to the medications, I am having to cough up all out of pocket costs.  One vial of the current medication I am on was running me from $55-$89.  Each day I was needing to take 1 vial, then I was increased to 2, and then 3... and yes finally 4.  This medication needs to be taken from 8-14 days.  Add that all up in your head, and you've got a lot of "dough" for us to come up with.  The worst part is that this is only a fraction of the entire costs for the build up on a procedure that may "not" work.

The key is to stay positive.  Don't think about the what if's.  This is not always possible when you throw life's everyday stresses into the jive.  That's when I depend on prayer, it helps me get through all my tough days.  Last night while I was laying in bed I spent a long time praying, praying for the outcome I needed today.

Today was my second follow up of the week.  The largest follicle I had on Monday was an 8mm, I need to be at around 18mm before we can go forward with an IUI.  Today my right ovary finally kicked it into gear and was producing an 10mm follicle.  Too little too late for my pocket book.  My reaction to the medications only took place after I was on the triple dose of Bravelle for 2 days.  It's still not where it should be for this late in my cycle so we decided to wait until my next cycle.  It was too big of a risk for me financially. 

Now back at square one, but at least we have found a mediation with can stimulate my follicles!!!  I feel like I finally can put that big strike as on my scoreboard.  The waiting period does seem to take forever.  I now have 2 weeks before I can start more medication to bring on my next cycle.

Since I have been slacking on my "Photo Challenge" I decided to have a throw all day.

Day 07 - A picture of your most treasured item
I started this journal when I started my journey with infertility.  It has been my place to log the medications, appointments and information I have gained or used.  It is what helps me remember all of the different things I need to do.  These days it's what helps me see everything I have been through already.

Day 08 - A picture that makes you laugh

I have met some even more amazing people through Adrienne.  One of the sweets and funnest women i know is Mary!  She has the most amazing personality I have ever met, she is so much fun to be around. 

I think this picture speaks for itself, and shows how funny we are together!!  Jenn is in the background.




Day 09 - A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most
I don't really have just 1 person who has gotten me through the most, it's actually a group of people.  My family.  They are by my side through thick and thin. 

**Photo taken by RB Photography**

Day 10 - A picture of the person you do the most ****** up things with
This challenge makes me laugh, especially this day.  We all have those friends which bring out your wild side.  You can act like 100% yourself and say anything and everything that's on your mind.  That girl is Dolly.  I met her when I was a dental assistant.  I couldn't imagine life without her!!!

Everyone needs a Dolly in their life!!!

Day 11 - A picture of something you hate
This is an easy one.  My alarm clock.  I always try to pick the best songs for my ipod to wake me up to and get me in the mode to get out of bed.  It never seems to work, I always find myself hitting the snooze button as many times as I can get away with.

(Please excuse the dust.)

Double Dose Friday & Photo Challenge Day Six

Today was my first follow up with my doctors office since I started the Bravelle injections.  It is a great feeling to be so welcomed every time I step foot inside the office doors.  I have grown a special bond with one of the nurses, Sally Ann.  In the times of doubt and being worried about things she and the rest of the staff are always there to help.

The ultrasound didn't go as great as I had hoped.  The words, "They may want to change your dosage" don't sound like a positive thing to me.  Although it is still early enough, I hope things change.  My right ovary is not producing follicles well.  I was told to start doubling my dose of medications which I need to inject each night.  Let's keep our fingers crossed for better results on Monday.  As for the rest of my day, my head was in a bit of a fog.  This emotional roller coaster sure can be hard at times.

Photo Challenge Day Six - A picture of a person you'd love to trade places with for a day

Some could call me crazy, but I think it would interesting to change places with Kate Gosselin or Jenny Masche.  I bet it was one of the most amazing days to realize they had 6 little life's inside them.  I can honestly say I'd love to trade places with any mother.  I think the gift of motherhood is one of the best gifts given to a woman in life.  It is something I have known I have wanted to be my entire life.  I always knew I wanted to have children.

(Pictures found via Google image search)

Photo Challenge Day Four

Day Four - A picture of your night.

There comes a point in your day when the sun goes away. The stars sometime will peak out from behind the city glow and the world seems calmer. The morning and afternoon rushes subside.

Tonight was injection number 2. You are supposed to switch the injection site, between 3 locations about 2 inches below your belly button each day. Today it was directly below about 2 inches. That feeling of the needle sliding in was intense. The first big sting followed by more stings as the medication slowly slipped through the needle tip and into my body.

How do you prepare yourself for this? How do you keep trying new medications and procedures which may not always have the outcome your looking for?

My Willow Tree is blooming tonight, and tonight I am reminded just how precious life is.  This week I have been minutes from 2 car accidents.  There was 2 fatal injuries in 1 accident that happen on Monday night.  Then this morning Route 47 seemed to stop for what felt like an eternity as medics tend to another accident. 

 
Why is is that bad things happen to good people?  Why do you get faced with the toughest decisons after already feeling like you've climbed a mountain? 

Sometimes there are people waiting for you at the top of that mountain and it's the start of something new.  Othertimes your making that climb alone and you soon realize you are only 1/2 way there.  It is those times I feel like you come out stronger than ever.  Tonight I pray that I am near the top of my Infertility Journey.  I know I still have many things to learn, but I am ready for what is next.

The Injection & Photo Challenge Day Three

Today I had a doctors appointment with the Fertility centers of Illinois.  I am on day 4 of my cycle, and got the go ahead to start injections tonight.  The morning appointment brought such a high to my day.  I felt like I was walking on air.  Back to work the day flew by, and I was ready to be home.

How does one prepare themselves for an injection?  I went over the "steps" on mixing the Bravelle and also how it should be injected.  I also watched the help videos on their website.  I felt ready, ready to mix that is but, not ready to stick myself with a needle.  Joe was more than willing to help.  He was too cute, joking with me about what could happen if he tripped with the sharp needle.  Wondering what the doctor would say if he called and asked if the medication had the same affect if he used it on himself.  The joke he thought was the funniest was if he tripped and it got shot into one of my Chihuahua's (note to animal lovers he was joking) instead.  It was good to see him finding this so much fun!!

The aftermath wasn't painful.  I was scared and worried for nothing.  Although, I did keep wondering, did we do it in the right spot.  So many what ifs.

Also I can't forget...
Photo Challenge Day Three - A picture of the cast from your favorite show

My favorite Show had to be the Ghost Whisperer.  Although I have to admit, I never knew about it till after it was cancelled.  Which is so sad.  Why on earth would they ever want to stop making these amazing episodes?